Monday, September 12, 2011

Baby Chafe - Deodorant Skid Marks

Sucks to soil the 177th top feeling with something usually only used to enhance it. You know the drill: it’s Thursday, so you change into something that screams “I’m 21” before heading to Copperfield’s. You stick some Aqua Reef on you and you’re ready to go. At the last possible moment you notice a white stain on the side of your shirt (like the chick in the picture). Who it is, how it got there, we do not know. All that can be confirmed at that moment is that the stain simply won’t cut it. What a waste. It’s not that there isn’t something else in your wardrobe that can replace your current shirt, it’s just a hassle to do so. Part of the reason is that the stain isn't immediate. It starts off faint, and doesn't blossom into a distraction until you're in your pregame. Also, this rarely happens, so when it does you’re caught off (Right) guard. Most deodorants don’t ever do this; when you switch up your deodorant game is when this happens. Sometimes you plow through the adversity, trying to ignore the splotch of sadness for the duration of the night. But with every encounter that night you know that you’re not at your best. You can see the little bastard smiling at you. It’s a spawn of Singler, and it doesn’t want you to succeed. I’ll figure you out one day, but I’ll never let you take a Thursday from me.

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